I'm finding more and more that my original desires arrived from a place of beneficial, positive intention. It is okay that I felt the way I did, and I'm not crazy for doing so. It appears that I was starting to be introduced to a higher vibrational energy. However, due to various circumstances, they were quite too immense and became extremely difficult for me to channel properly and control.
It makes a lot of sense that I've gone through what I have these past years. I needed to learn that I cannot allow my hopes for a "new earth" allow me to not accept and understand the immutable law of free will. Though yearning for a better understanding of the Infinite, my ultimate objectives (though spiritually based) were indeed still focused within this physical illusion. Now I have the chance to apply the love I felt and wanted to give to this world in a realistic manner...free of delusional ideals, understanding healthy limits.
There is much I need to learn and work on. I'm glad that in mid-March 2011 both of them told me to "just be." I probably wouldn't be where I am right now. Nor would I be able to piece together that lesson with those intense forthcoming experiences and all I am presently studying.
"This, my friends, is what man of Earth must return to if he is to know reality: this simple thought of absolute love, a thought of total unity with all his brothers regardless of how they might express themselves or whom they might be, for this is the original thought of your Creator."